She turned on the light on her nightstand. Kicking off her shoes, she sat on the side of her bed. ‘Join me?’ I couldn’t think of anything to say...that wasn’t completely stupid, so I took off my shoes and sat down next to her. ‘Is something wrong with me?’ she asked. ‘No.’ ‘Are you a virgin, Mark?’ ‘No.’ ‘Neither am I. I had sex a few times with my ex-boyfriend. My only boyfriend.’ ‘What happened? Why aren’t you still with him?’ Inside I was smacking myself. I couldn’t get it through my thick. So, what was getting in the way of fulfilling mydark, forbidding dream?The reality of the whipping had been a painful surprise and it stillloomed large in my memory. Nothing in my experience prepared me forthat fiery, cutting pain. The question that I was grappling with was:If I had been better prepared for the experience (trained?), or if thewhipping had not been so severe for a first session, would I stillhesitate now?The clock read three minutes until the appointed hour. Swallowing hardto. .” she began “wait how do you know about that already?” I asked and she said she heard mom screaming at dad about it over the phone this morning before she went to school. How do you feel about it? I asked. “Well I don’t really feel much I guess” she said and her eyes got watery. Come on Nessa talk to me. She wailed and began sobbing incoherently. All I heard was how could he do that to our family and Aunt Lucy is a whore. “It’s ok Nessa, people who do bad stuff always have it come back to. Wewere quite the couple, and as we liked to call each other, D and Psomething that evolved from our address labels were we simply wrote D &P Peterson. We were a happily married couple, with my wife taking greatcare of my needs, everything from fixing wonderful meals to making sureI had nice clothes to wear, although my closet and drawers were meagercompared to hers. She was what you might call a clothes collector asshe had far more things than she could ever use, but always was a suckerfor a.
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