More humor according to St John‎JokesI said to my neighbour “Are you aware your teenage daughter was in your garden sun bathing topless today?” ...ith a disbelieving look he said “Are you sure?” “Yes” I said “and I’ve got loads of pictures to prove it”.THE FOUR KINDS OF SEX. HOUSE SEX: When you are newly married and have sex all over the house in every room. BEDROOM SEX: After you have been married for a while, you only have sex in the bedroom. HALL SEX: After you’ve been married for many, many. "What then?" I said, more than a little deflated. He nodded down at theremaining items on the desk. It suddenly dawned on me what he wanted--thedirty bugger wanted to see me using the sex toys on myself!I opened my makeup bag and took out the small bottle of Astroglide. If hewanted a sex show, I was going to give him one. I pulled out the tube ofKate Spade New York's Pucker Up--in sexy "Adventure Red"--and applied aquick and generous coat to my pursed lips just for good measure.I picked up. I could see her wedding band, so assumed she had a husband. Iwould have bet anything that he had a big belly, likely a beer belly,bigger than the small bulge that she showed. But it was her, not him, whowas worried that she looked 'fat' and was contemplating wiggling into thetight control garment. Women even as they aged, had to constantly worryabout their appearance and trying to be attractive. As she continued tolook at the girdle, the other saleslady came over and offered anassessment: it. "Kelly, there is no easy to say this, but last night your mother told me that I am your father." Her eyes got huge and she started to tremble. "You have to believe me -- if I had known, I would have been here with you. The big question is; do you want me in your life?"She finally found her voice, at least in part. "You're... I mean... Jason Daniels is my dad?" With each word her voice rose in pitch. Suddenly she bolted from the chair and ran into her room. I was shocked, and Donna looked.
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