’ The camera came up to her eye again and I froze. ‘Show you my …?’ ‘Lift your skirt, girl. Now! Stop dithering and do as you’re told or t...ere will be no alternative other than the police … Now!’ I jumped, as If I had been slapped and pulled at my skirt, gathering it quickly above my knickers. ‘Slowly, Josie, slowly.’ ‘Click, click, click.’ I felt stupid. Holding up my skirt while a stranger took photos of me exposing my knickers. I glanced down and looked at my legs and my feet in their white. Where was the one? A second sweep of the enclosure found her losing further hope. The youngest individuals in the bar were no more than nineteen, by the looks of them, probably with a beautifully constructed fake ID to match their childlike innocence. The young girl gyrated in her counterpart’s lap slowly, the pair sipping from a green bottle. Dutch. No good, she thought. No good. She turned to her lover and watched him as he watched this crowd. His brown eyes swept slowly from the swaying hips. What he might be doing right now and constantly wondering if he is thinking of me at all. If he even cares about me to begin with? Etc, etc, etc. Insert standard sadness shit here, blah... As you know, I struggle with trying to distract myself with other tasks or activities that might help take my mind off how unworthy I feel - and how much wine I've consumed in recent months - but nothing is helping. I can't even find someone who is willing to hold me for longer than a few hours, without it. By noon, I was ready to die from the heat, as were several of the film crew. Kitty took pity on us after I sweat through my third shirt. I started to wonder about Jim’s sanity for going to school in Alabama. I’d been there in the summer and it was every bit as hot and humid as it was in Cuba in mid-May. I didn’t necessarily mind the heat; it was the humidity that was the killer.Kitty let us all take a break to get drinks and cool off. I found Cassidy sitting on a deck chair near the bow..
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